With Valentine's Day approaching, thoughts are turning to romance and a couple of stories in our family histories seem, well...very romantic.
My grandmother once told me that my great, great grandmother was a well-to-do Irish 'lady' who fell in love with her butler and ran away with him from Ireland to Liverpool where they set up a 'love nest' and had two children. Whether or not that is true I don't know. My grandmother was a feisty old bird with many, many stories which she enjoyed regaling to us whilst wearing her mink coat (she was rather well-off) and sucking noisily on what she called 'pep-mints'.
My other half has an ancestor who was a blacksmith who went away to war, fell in love with a dark-eyed Romani woman (who strangely was also a blacksmith) married her, brought her back to Wales where upon they lived happily ever after with their large brood of children.
Now that IS true and I have to admit - very romantic.
Sadly though, I'm not in the least a romantic soul. That was killed stone dead when at thirteen, Michael Sparks (the most fancied boy at school) told me I was the only girl for him and twenty minutes later was snogging Prudence Wright on Glenfield Golf Course. And Prudence, wherever you are in the world - I still haven't forgiven you!!!
That was it! Stuff all that sweet talking malarky. From that day on I wanted love shown in tangible, practical ways that demonstrated true affection and thoughtfulness not a quick kiss and empty, meaningless promises.
I'm unimpressed with chocolates and champagne, soppy poems and cards. Lead me to a bedroom scattered with rose petals and all I'd be thinking is 'who's going to have to clean that lot up? Me, I suppose! Where's the Dyson?'
For our first wedding anniversary I bought my O.H a coal scuttle.
Yes, I know it wasn't very romantic.
But I saw it as being thoughtful because he was forever complaining about the rusted old bucket he dragged to the coal bunker outside our cottage.
I once bought him a carpet stretcher (as you know, he cleans carpets) He didn't seemed particularly thrilled at the time but hey, wasn't he always saying ' if only I had a carpet stretcher.'
And what about the time I bought him some furry inner soles for his shoes?
See, practical and thoughtful! And yes, he was pleased with those as his feet were always freezing in the winter. Isn't that better than a mushy card?
And now you are all feeling really sorry for him, aren't you?
However, seeing as it's nearly Valentine's I decided to do a little internet research into this whole 'romance/Valentine's Day thing' and believe it or someone described Valentine's Day as a:
"A Road Chef (Little Chef) on the highway of love. It's a place where you could stop and buy a tasteless but expensive meal or you could just take this opportunity to park up with the one you love and appreciate the journey you've made together"
Well now, once you've stopped gagging, I will explain the above quote came from a French person -- need I say more?
But it would seem that people don't necessarily want roses and chocolates or a petal strewn bed and champagne. As nice as they may be, research shows that people would prefer little gestures that say 'I care.'
They want a thoughtful little phone call in the middle of the day to ask how they are.
A nice meal prepared for them when they get home from a hard day at work.
A lovely, hot bath run for them when they are tired.
In other words, thoughtful yet practical ways that say I care about you.
So I was right, after all.
On the other hand, I wouldn't say no to this!
